Kanye West = Asshole

With tributes continuing to pour in for Michael Jackson questions about his life, his death, and his legacy also continue to mount. It is unlikely that the first two topics will ever be covered to full satisfaction but the latter is a different story entirely. Though Jackson hadn’t produced much music in the last fifteen years, and his most influential for more than twenty, his influence and standing in the musical and cultural world are unmatched. With his death now sinking in as a reality fans and the music industry are looking for a successor to his throne, and one man feels he has found it.

Since he first burst onto the scene in 2004 Kanye West has been one of the most influential and best-selling music artists in the world. With such smashes as ‘Jesus Walks’, ‘Gold Digger’, and ‘Flashing Lights’, West’s impact on the music scene has been enormous. Though hugely popular, few would compare his success to the success Michael Jackson enjoyed in his early days. Amongst those few is West himself who has declared himself the successor to Jackson’s legacy and the new ‘King of Pop’.

“You know everyone loves and respects Michael but times change. It’s so sad to see Michael gone but it makes a path for a new King of Pop and I’m willing to take that on. There’s nobody who can match me in sales and in respect so it only makes sense for me to take over Michael’s crown and become the new King,” said West. “First there was Elvis, then there was Michael, now in the 21st century its Kanye’s time to rule. I have nothing but respect for Michael but someone needs to pick up where he left off and there’s nobody better than me to do that. I am the new King of Pop.”

Jackson earned the nickname ‘King of Pop’ after a comment from Elizabeth Taylor. Officially there is no monarchy for music of any kind and hence no line of succession.

“Monarchies can pass to non-blood relatives but only in very rare circumstances. In the case of musical monarchies it is really just a marketing title and has nothing to do with a ruling class or managing people or organizational structures. There really isn’t a need to declare anyone else the new King because it isn’t a real position but I guess if West wants to claim the title then all power to him,” said Scrape TV Entertainment analyst Tracey Temple. “It is a little soon to claim that title and that may irritate a few people. It’s not like the people will revolt and the kingdom will collapse if someone isn’t right there to pick up the sceptre and continue the rule. I’m sure the Jackson family won’t be too happy with the news.”

West has reportedly tried to make contact with members of the Jackson clan to obtain official permission to use the title but has thus far received no response. It is believed the family is mourning the death of their loved one and have given little thought to the line of succession.

“We’ll have to wait and see what Jackson’s will shows about who he felt should take over for him but that of course may not be legally binding. In traditional monarchies if someone other than the first born is to take over then the King or Queen has to make that clear and have it written out. In the case of these kinds of informal ruling classes there aren’t any hard and fast rules and that may become one of the many legal issues that will have to be worked out,” continued Temple. “Of course the question then becomes whether or not Kanye West is deserving of the title and what kind of ruler he will be. It’s unlikely that he will follow Jackson’s type of career path but he is well on his way to his own form of eccentricity which accompanies many monarchs. In that respect he may follow Jackson, though musically that is a different question entirely.”

West made his declaration in an all caps statement issued to all major media outlets.